Divorce creates stress. Stress leads to impulsive reactions instead of thoughtful responses. Stress does not put you at your best when you have to make important decisions. That anxiety is not exclusive to you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse. Children also bear the brunt.
As you try to resolve issues surrounding your divorce, you face a pivotal time where life is changing. Your actions during this difficult period truly matter to you and your children.
How Will You Set The Tone Of Your Divorce?
Since they were born, your children have learned from your example. How you conduct yourself when faced with the hurdles inherent in the divorce process is no different. They are looking to you to see how you act and react.
Your marriage created a family. How you handle that relationship, even one that is ending in divorce, will provide important life lessons to your children. Consider your conduct as a teaching moment. You are setting an example as to how to get along with not only loved ones, but also non-family members both now and in the future.
Costly Divorce Litigation Putting Children In The Middle
Divorce trials are costly – both financially and emotionally. Litigation involves two polarized sides no longer able to find common ground on their own. Their idea of problem solving is a fight. They refuse to let deep emotional wounds heal.
High-conflict divorces often involve children who are placed in the center of the disputes. They are left little choice but to pick a side when there is no middle ground to stand on. They watch as someone they do not know, specifically a judge, makes decisions for them and their parents. It is an example that will leave a lasting impression.
Reducing And Eliminating Conflict Through Mediation
Mediation not only sets the tone for the divorce process, but also your post-marital life. Sitting down with your spouse in a cooperative setting allows you to speak openly about all the issues. With the help of an attorney-mediator, conflicts are dealt with directly by talking, not filing motions and testifying against each other.
Most importantly, an attorney-mediator gives you control. Control of the decisions made in your divorce. Control of the tone established through divorce.
Equally as important, you have control over the example you are setting for your children.