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Tackling the emotional elements of divorce mediation

Of all the emotions that divorce elicits, anger is often near the top of the list.

Anger over the end of a marriage usually does not occur overnight. It is likely a slow burn that evolves from the ongoing uncertainty and outright shock that comes with a personal loss. Anyone dealing with an angry, soon-to-be ex-spouse feels the need to tread carefully.

Whether a divorce was the decision of one or both spouses, anger is both normal and understandable. However, the inability to control emotions will only make a bad situation worse. Refusing to cooperate can sabotage any level of collaboration and send a divorce into even more costly and protracted litigation.

An experienced attorney-mediator who has dealt with the feelings attendant to a divorce or other family law related issue can effectively address the anger and help the parties overcome this negativity.

Instead of suppression, anger can be used as a tool to foster the process. Understanding and respecting how the other party feels can make a difference. As with any spouse involved in divorce mediation, they need assurance that they can express themselves in an open forum without judgment or interruption.

In many cases, getting a spouse to open up can reveal otherwise suppressed needs and goals. What was once a blockade may become a bridge. It is up to the attorney-mediator to build upon that and find common ground and even shared concerns and objectives between both spouses.

Divorce mediation involves continuing interactions with an individual who may be the source of ongoing frustration. Again, an experienced attorney-mediator can properly manage those emotions and expectations. Whether spouses struggle with being in the same room or more breaks are required, a tailored process can continue despite the personal conflicts that exist.

Divorce mediation can be transformative to the most angry and fearful of spouses. They may walk in irritable as they face an unknown process and an equally uncertain future. With proper guidance, they can leave divorce mediation with a clearer future and something else that has eluded them for far too long.

Peace of mind.

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